From the Official Klingon Joke Book
Q: How many Klingons does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Klingons aren’t afraid of the dark.
There is, apparently, only the one entry.
Smoking & IQ?
I have long thought that smoking was particularly stupid. Now it seems that the observation makes more sense than I realized.
Smoking and IQ
So, now my question is: “Which came first?” Does smoking make you dumb? Or, is it just that dumb people smoke? Kinda a “chicken and egg” question, huh?
New Dr. Bill Podcast available! #5
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Dr. Bill Podcast – 5 – (10/08/05)
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My job change, “All Your Base…”, 20 Geek Jokes the Masses May Not Get, Dell’s New NC Plant, Put Firefox on Steroids!, Geek Software of the Week: Paint.NET, The Definition of Windows… more on fixing Windows next week!
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Put Firefox on Steroids!
Dewd! If you use Firefox, ya gotta try this!
It makes Firefox FLY on the net. When you click on the link to install, you will have to allow the pop-up from the web-site, then click it again. Get out of Firefox, back in… and watch it FLY!
Dell’s New NC Plant
Dell’s new manufacturing plant was dedicated yesterday by Michael Dell and Gov. Easley. The new 750,000-square-foot facility–the company’s third and largest plant in the U.S.–will produce the company’s OptiPlex and Dimension desktop computer products for eastern parts of the nation. Way to go NC!
20 Geek Jokes the Masses May Not Get
1) There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.
2) If at first you don’t succeed; call it version 1.0
3) My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
4) Roses are #FF0000
Violets are #0000FF
All my base
Are belong to you.
5) Microsoft: “You’ve got questions. We’ve got dancing paperclips.”
6) I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
7) The box said, “Requires Windows 95 or better.” So I installed Linux.
8) In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
9) Hand over the calculator, friends don’t let friends derive drunk.
10) You know it’s love when you memorize her IP number to skip DNS overhead.
11) Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny.
12) Linux, DOS and Windows…the good, the bad and the ugly.
13) Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
14) How do I set a laser printer to stun?
15) Failure is not an option — it comes bundled with Windows.
16) People say that if you play Microsoft CD’s backwards, you hear satanic things, but that’s nothing, because if you play them forwards, they install Windows.
17) Windows had detected you do not have a keyboard. Press “F9” to continue.
18) Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.
19) SELECT * FROM users WHERE clue > 0
– returned 0 results
20) There is no place like 127.0.0.1
Geek Software of the Week: Better than Photoshop? Well…
This week’s Geek Software is “Paint.NET.” It is a class project from MIT that has continued since being developed in a .NET programming class. It is written in C#. The idea was to make a “better” Microsoft Paint. They added in layers, and it has grown to nearly (but not quite) Photoshop proportions! The nice thing is… unlike Photoshop, it is FREE!
You won’t regret checking it out!
The Definition of Windows
Win·dows
Noun.
A thirty-two bit extension and graphical shell to a sixteen-bit patch to an eight-bit operating system originally coded for a four-bit microprocessor which was written by a two-bit company that can’t stand one bit of competition.
OK, sorry, I am feeling particularly “curmudgeon-ly” today.
New PodProducer Web Site
As you know, I am a HUGE Open Source fan! And I support Open Source efforts! The latest move in that regard is my hosting the site of Alfredo Romo, creator of the excellent Open Source software for recording podcasts called “PodProducer!” The new domain name is:
It is great to be able to do something concrete to support such excellent Open Source efforts! Way to go, Alfredo!
Dr. Bill Podcast #4 is out!
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The Dr. is in! And he is grumpy! Find out why this week!
Dr. Bill Podcast – 4 – (10/01/05)
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Broken Shift Lock on my Laptop (Grrrrr!@#$), October 1, 2005 (25 years of ethernet), Microsoft celebrates its 30th anniversary, 25 years of color tv sales?!? (Nah.), 10th anniversary of eBay, Lego 50th anniversary, 100 years of Relativity (Einstein), $100.00 laptop designed at MIT, Giant squid pictures on CNN and all over the web (Nemo would be proud), Firefox is #1 in PCWorld.com’s 100 Best Products of 2005, Serenity – “more engaging than any of Lucas’s recent screen entertainment?”, Does oil regenerate?, Knoppix 4.0.2 DVD Released, New version of Podproducer-But it doesn’t work (Grrrrr!@#$), Write a Mac OSX virus and get $500, Acryllic .. Flash Killer?, VISA and Mastercard told they do not have to send out notices for stolen credit card numbers!
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